How to Find the Right One & Make It Last! Book Summary
We all want that special someone in our lives. But isn't it odd that one of life's most important lessons tends to receive the least amount of focus. It's no wonder why we have so little success attracting the love, passion, romance and fun that we all need and desire.
The problem for many busy and successful people is that they do not know where to find and meet the right partners, how to approach dating, or what it takes to build and sustain a healthy, loving relationship. To address these issues, I have taken a unique approach and have written this book about real people, like you, who struggle with finding love and the right companionship. Many who have used my techniques have been able to find happy rewarding relationships.
This book provides real world experiences and proven dating strategies and techniques. It's a guide that can be used to change your life and bring you the romance and love you've always wanted.
Charles Johnson's Bio
After more than 20 years in the military and 16 in a corporate environment, Charles Johnson found another calling in life. In both the Air Force as well the many companies he founded or worked in, Charles managed and mentored diverse teams across Europe, Asia and North America. But he wasn’t your typical corporate manager.
Charles always focused more on the whole person and how to help those who worked with and around him find balance and achieve both personal and professional success. He found that he was helping people not only get well-deserved promotions or the financial recognition for their work, but he also helped them identify and realize what makes them happy.
Helping others create a life and a lifestyle where their happiness is a priority and life balance is the primary goal became Charles’ new life work. He became a certified life coach and author and has dedicated himself to helping single people find and select the right life and marriage partners and make it last.
Surrounded by three sisters and eight female cousins, Charles had a significant female influence growing up. With the knowledge he gleaned from that experience, he spent the last 25 years coaching and mentoring hundreds of single professionals and up-and-coming, career-minded men and women -- including his own four daughters. He found himself providing guidance to help these otherwise successful individuals improve their personal confidence by updating their image, polishing their social skills and providing insight into the art of establishing and maintaining relationships.
Charles has connected and helped hundreds of couples find marriage or committed partners and coaches them on how to make relationships last. He has been married for more than 33 years and three of his four daughters are now married.
Charles has found happiness and balance in his own life as well, pursuing his passions as an avid traveler, photography enthusiast, art collector and a supporter of various charitable causes. He enjoys basketball, football and tennis. His greatest passion is writing about hope and how people can achieve their dreams and still have a balanced and complete life.
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Publisher: Two Harbors Press
Release: April 24, 2012
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KNOW WHAT YOU ARE LOOKING FOR
Many people are unsuccessful in finding the "right partner" because they do not know what they are looking for in a partner. They have not spent enough time clearly defining what traits, characteristics, or features they prefer their future partner to have. Equally—if not more importantly—people also need to decide which traits they do not want in a potential partner. Let me introduce you to my friend Michael, who found himself frustrated and wondering about his future and finding the right person.
Michael had just completed graduate school in Texas. He was handsome, smart, well dressed, and equipped with a master's degree in hospital administration from one of Texas's most prestigious universities and a new high-paying job in Tulsa, Oklahoma. One night not long after graduation, Michael found himself with his old college buddies in a local bar, enjoying a night of drinks and hoping to find a great woman to be with.
After Michael surveyed the bar scene, he quickly realized this could end up being his daily personal life going forward. He had already achieved great scholastic and initial career success but found his life lacking in the personal area. He started talking to himself, saying, "Am I going to spend the rest of my life looking at barflies, hoping to find the right woman to complete my life and raise a family with?" Michael suddenly became depressed and quickly realized he was going to have to put some serious time into his personal life if he was going to escape the life of a single professional who cruised the bars nightly, looking for someone special. He knew he needed to sit down and determine exactly what he was looking for in a woman and where best to find her.
He did not want just anyone; he wanted someone special to love and spend the rest of his life with. Michael knew he wasn't about to find that kind of woman in the bars he and his friends frequented. Michael identified the traits and qualities that were important to him and ended up getting back together with his college sweetheart. He realized that she had everything he was looking for. He married her after recognizing she would complete his dreams, love him faithfully, enhance his life, and build the family he imagined.
The moral of this story is quite simple: Michael took the time to discover what he didn't want, which made it much easier to determine what he did want in a partner—and then he could make the right decision in his selection.
So many people make the mistake of trying to find the right partner before they determine what they are really looking for. You have to start by doing a little homework—nothing too difficult or time-consuming but something that will improve your search and selection efforts by at least tenfold. With that kind of increase in your chances for success, isn't it worth doing a little up-front work? You do it all the time in your job, so why not do it in your personal life as well?
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Please tell us about your current release.
For the millions of singles around the world who have struggled to find the right one or to maintain a lasting relationship, my book, “How to Find the Right One & Make it Last,” provides a tutorial on the lost art of dating. “How to Find the Right One and Make it Last: Bring Love and Romance Back to Dating” offers practical advice for both men and women about how to initiate interaction as well as how to respond in various dating situations.
In addition to the book, I created a website, http://www.AskCharlesJohnson.com, where my readers can have easy access to relationship advice and personal coaching at any time.
I have been officially and unofficially helping clients and colleagues find personal success. Over the years, I have developed a proven set of principles and concepts that have helped singles looking for love not only find their ideal life partner, but also to keep the relationship fresh and thriving.
Over the years, I have watched my colleagues work incredibly hard to achieve professional success, but often struggle to find that same level of success in their personal lives. By applying the same discipline from their professional development to fine-tuning their dating skills, these colleagues transformed their lives and found the personal fulfillment that had previously been so elusive.
My book provides step-by-step guidance starting with how an individual can make small changes in their personal style and appearance or to their daily routine to improve the odds of finding their ideal partner. I walk readers through the first call, planning the perfect date, and what to say and do on the date. Everything first starts with a clear idea of what each individual is looking for – as well as what they’re not – to provide a guide along the way.
The principles don’t stop once a match has been made. The book provides advice for nurturing relationships for the long run. By walking readers through the seven phases of relationships, I explain how and why they change over time and how to keep them growing strong.
I draw on personal experience, primary research, and the stories of more than 500 singles I’ve connected and 118 who I’ve helped marry and continue to help. I’ve have peppered their stories throughout the book to highlight the principles in action.
Also included is a chapter to help unravel the mystery of Internet dating sites. I outline practical guidance on how to get the most out of the Internet dating site as well as what to be weary of when using the various sites.
Can you tell us about the journey that led you to write your book?
As a corporate senior executive I had the responsibility of taking new young talent and developing them into executives. For 15 years, I groomed hundreds of men and women in the boardroom and thought them the principals that would help them achieve all their professional and financial goals. I was honored and enjoyed mentoring them and watched their careers grow. But, I discovered, as my successful executives matured they would turn to me for guidance in their personal lives. Most of them who were in their early 30’s had achieved all their financial goals but lacked a personal life and wanted someone special with whom they could share their life. Many of them had been so focused on building their professional skills that they lacked the social and personal skills required to connect with someone special. That was the beginning of my unofficial matchmaking business. Over the years, I mentored my up and coming executives and helped them first determine what to look for in a partner and then helped them execute a plan of action. I would run social scenarios and conduct role-play to help them become more confident in social environments. I’ve worked with over 500 people and been able to connect and help marry 118 couples. And, to this day I continue to help the couples to keep their relationship alive and fresh.
When I left the corporate world five years ago, many of the people I mentored and their friends still called for guidance. I decided to write a book that would help everyone in similar situations to give them a starting point to change their personal life and give them a road-map to “How to Find the Right One & Make it Last.”
Can you tell us about the story behind your book cover?
I wanted to have the book cover to convey an emotion in people. We wanted the book cover to convey passion and we chose the burnt orange as the color for the cover of the book because it’s the color of fire.
What book on the market does yours compare to? How is your book different?
I cannot think of a book that is anything like the book I’ve written. In my years of mentoring and matchmaking I found that there was nothing in the market that gave single people practical tools and a step-by-step guide in how to find the right person and make their relationships last. I found that many professional adults needed to learn the skills and gain the confidence that would improve their dating prospects and I don’t believe there is anything in the market to help them. That’s part of the reason I decided to write the book. Finding the right person that will be a life partner is a process and no author has ever written about that process.
What would you say is your most interesting writing quirk?
I am a retired Air Force and senior vice president from the corporate world. My writing style and quirk is my ability to write in a very conversational and relatable manner.
Open your book to a random page and tell us what’s happening?
I’m on page 32 where I describe how one can meet quality people by taking a dance class. People always wonder where they can meet new people who can be potential partners. I always tell my clients to change their routine. One way to do that is to take a dance class in your local community college or dance studio.
Do you plan any subsequent books?
I am currently working on a workbook that will be an extension of “How to Find the Right One & Make it Last!”
I am also working on a teen book based on a similar topic.
Tell us what you’re reading at the moment and what you think of it?
I am re-reading “You Can Heal Your Life,” by Louise Hay. The book gives people great insight into how they can change their life and make it the life they always imagined. It helped me re-invent my life and myself after leaving corporate America. Using the principles in Hay’s book, I have been able to take my experience from my military and corporate life and show people how to be successful in their personal lives and relationships.
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